By Professor Patricia Riddell and Ian McDermott

As Christmas approaches, it often brings a heady mix of excitement and exhaustion. Between decorating trees, buying gifts, and navigating family expectations, there’s an unspoken pressure to “make it a happy one.”

But have you ever stopped to ask yourself: Do we really know what makes us happy?

Neuroscience offers some surprising answers — and they may not be what you expect. By understanding a little about how your brain processes happiness, memory, and reward, you can create a Christmas that’s not just merry, but truly meaningful.

1. Anticipation Is Half the Fun

The brain’s dopamine system — the circuitry responsible for motivation and pleasure — lights up not just when we receive something rewarding, but even more when we anticipate it. Research shows that we often overestimate how long a burst of happiness will last. That much-anticipated gift or perfect meal feels wonderful while we are waiting for it to happen, and then for a while after the moment has arrived… but then fades.

Action:

Don’t rush to the finish line. Enjoy the anticipation — the planning, decorating, preparing, and dreaming — as much as the day itself. Your brain will thank you for it.

2. Keep the Magic Mysterious

When we can’t quite predict what’s going to happen, the brain releases more dopamine — the chemical that also fuels curiosity and excitement. This is why childhood Christmases felt so magical: we didn’t know exactly what was under the tree or how Santa got in.

Once we “make sense” of events, emotional intensity fades. The magic, quite literally, disappears.

Action:

Build in a few surprises. Leave something unexplained. Let curiosity and wonder do their work.

3. Imagine If Christmas Were Cancelled…

It might sound strange, but imagining the absence of something we love can actually make us appreciate it more. If you’ve ever found yourself saying, “I wish we could just skip Christmas this year,” try visualising that — the quiet house, no music, no shared laughter — and you’ll probably feel your festive spirit reignite.

Action:

Use imagination strategically. Remind your brain what it would lose without the joy, ritual, and connection of the season.

4. Happiness Thrives on Challenge

When Patricia recalls her happiest Christmases, it’s not the gifts she remembers — it’s the chaotic family pantomimes, the laughter, and the creative problem-solving. This fits with research showing that we’re happiest when we’re challenged but capable. The brain thrives in the “flow zone” — where effort meets meaning.

Action:

Add a touch of challenge to your celebrations — a team quiz, a homemade project, or cooking something new together. The brain loves the stretch.

5. Connection and Kindness Boost the Brain

Helping others activates the same reward centres as receiving a gift yourself. Whether it’s volunteering, donating, or simply being present for someone lonely, giving time and care releases oxytocin and dopamine — the brain’s feel-good chemistry.

Action:

Do something for someone else this Christmas. It doesn’t need to be grand — small acts of generosity have big neurological payoffs.

6. Happiness Comes in Small Bites

Would you rather have one huge, joyful moment or lots of small ones? Neuroscience says it’s the frequency of positive emotions, not the intensity, that best predicts happiness.

Action:

Scatter joy throughout the day — from that first coffee by the tree to a walk in the crisp air, a shared joke, or a quiet moment of gratitude.

7. End on a High

Our brains remember experiences not by their average emotion, but by their final moment. That means the way your Christmas ends will shape how you remember it for years to come

Action:

Plan your finale. End the day with something sparkling and uplifting — a toast, a story, or a shared reflection on the year that’s been.

8. The Real Gift Is Giving

Ironically, we’re happier when we give than when we receive. It’s not the price tag that matters, but the meaning. Giving engages neural circuits of empathy, belonging, and reward — the true sources of joy.

Action:

Think less about what you’ll get this year and more about what you can give: your time, your attention, your compassion.

 

Have a NeuroEffectively Happy Christmas

What neuroscience teaches us is that happiness isn’t found in perfect presents or flawless plans — it’s created through anticipation, curiosity, connection, and giving.

These insights are just a glimpse into how understanding your brain can transform not only your Christmas, but your leadership, wellbeing, and relationships all year round.

So, this year, don’t just have a merry Christmas.  Have a neuroeffective one — and make memories your brain will cherish.